Funeral Thank You Notes - The Thank You Notes Blog

In the wake of the loss of a loved one, there doesn’t seem to be any time or desire to write funeral thank you notes for all the thoughtful things our friends and families do to ease our burdens.

After a funeral, writing thank you notes can seem a bit overwhelming, so make a list of everyone you would like to thank and what you would like to thank them for.

As you have time, or if you need a distraction, you can write a few at a time. Even a month after the funeral, people will appreciate the thought.

Table of Contents

Who Do You Need to Thank?

It is not necessary to thank everyone who attended the funeral. If someone was particularly helpful or donated something, just send a thank you note.

Some examples of who you might want to thank:

For donated flowers
For donated food
For a nice eulogy

Any other person you wish to thank is up to you, and not governed by etiquette.

When Do You Need to Send Them?

The majority of people choose to send thank you notes, two to six weeks after the funeral.

Funeral Thank You Note Examples

A Funeral Thank You Note Example

Dear Georgia,

  Your flowers were appreciated, and I am grateful. The tiger lily was Erin's favorite flower. She would be pleased that you remembered her.   
  Every day is still a struggle without her. Her room has been difficult to clean. I will probably leave it for a while. Would you like the pictures she took of the camping trip in 2005 when I do?   

Yours Truly,
Aunt El

The most common thank you note is for a flower arrangement. Fortunately, you can usually remove the tag that indicates who sent which emails.

Mentioning the type of flowers is a good idea. The recipient will appreciate your attention to detail as well as your appreciation of them.

Thank You for The Flowers

Dear Ms. Jenkins,

  You were very kind to remember us with the beautiful bouquet. James mentioned you as one of his favorite co-workers, even though we have not met. It would have been nice to get to know each other better. Thank you very much...   

Belinda

When arrangements have been made for a funeral or wake, you can still write a quick thank you note to the sender to let them know their efforts were appreciated.

Thanks For Attending the Funeral

Jim,

  I appreciate your attendance at Ned's funeral. Thank you for being there to offer your support. You two were close friends, I know. You were highly regarded by him. You always beat him at poker, especially. We will miss him. We look forward to seeing you soon. You can call ahead, and I'll make your favorite- Chicken and Dumplings.   

Love,
Beth

Thank those who attended the funeral with a thank you note. If you have a guest registry, this task will be easier. You won’t have to remember who was at the funeral that way.

A note like this requires some thought, especially when you are unfamiliar with the person. A personal tone is preferable if it is an old friend, like in the above example. A personal dialog that highlights the relationship shared with the deceased lets them know that you acknowledge their loss too, and an invitation to visit lets them know that they are not strangers, even if you are still grieving.

Thanks for Attending Sample Note

Dear Mr. Morton,

  Jonathon never invited you to dinner, which is a shame. It would have been pleasant, I'm sure. Thank you for attending the funeral. Despite meeting you for the first time there, I am glad we had the chance to remember him together.   

In his memory,
Laura Beasley

The unknown guest at the funeral is there because they too feel the loss of your loved one, just like the note from an unknown flower sender. Thanking them for being there is thoughtful and kind.

Thanks For Bringing Food to The Wake

Bethany,

  The casserole you brought for the wake was much appreciated. Your pastas were always Billy's favorites, and there were plenty to feed the family for days, which was a blessing since no one has felt like cooking since the funeral.   

  Let's have coffee and take a walk down memory lane when things are back to normal. Yesterday I found that old picture of you and Billy kayaking in the river. I'd love to share it with you.   

-Sarah

Most people who bring food are close enough to warrant a very personal thank you note.

Despite the fact that she has no experience cooking, Sarah thanked her for providing enough leftovers to help the family through their mourning. A funeral thank you note lets them know that they are welcome, even though the wording used here lets them know that now may not be the best time.

Thanks For The Beautiful Eulogy

Arthur,

  You prepared a beautiful Eulogy for Grant's funeral. Thank you for speaking for us. You said everything I know we wanted to say, but couldn't find the words. Grant was a vital part of this community, his friends, and his family. I'm glad you mentioned all of them.   
  Because of your careful direction, the service was filled with joy and grateful, happy memories. Tears of joy turned into tears of pain. Even though I still miss my son, I will always remember him as a good and loving person who 'changed the way we think.'   

Eternally grateful,
Julie

It takes a great deal of effort to write a Eulogy that not only describes the life and works of a loved one but inspires joy in those left behind.

Funeral thank you notes are delicate and difficult to write. Filling each one with personal thoughts and gratitude will lighten your heart and ease the pain, even if it’s just for a short time.

Related thank you help…

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Thank You Quotes
Personal Thank You Notes